Revisiting an old post, with new thoughts ...

... Bear with me ladies, my "original thought" has been shanghaied by a looking-back-over some things I'd written before. And rereading them caught my attention in a way that I think is ... timely, and warrants expansion. (Which  means that my original thought gets to keep percolating and developing, yay!) So let's call it patchwork, and see what we end up with, eh? :o)

Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted. (Matthew 5.4)

I was in a church service one day, and the pastor was speaking on this verse. He was presenting mourning as a dire punishment of sorts, basically in a very negative context; as well as saying that only those who are 'mourning for/because of God' will be comforted, and in being so comforted will see the Kingdom of God. As if you can't be comforted or see God unless you mourn. And it bugged me, bugged me a lot. And I started thinking, mulling it over ... and here's the conclusion I came to:

Those who mourn, will be comforted.
To be able to mourn means you have a heart capable of feeling - both joy and pain. The purest and truest emotions are those stemming from close, intimate contact with God the Father. Therefore, those who are able to mourn are close to God, and therefore are able to be comforted - not only in their mourning but their joy as well - while those who are apart from God might feel something, but not be within reach of comfort. God doesn't want us to be in pain/mourning/to suffer necessarily, although He will use that to make us grow ... He longs to comfort us, all of us, we just have to be close enough to let Him.

And as I think about that again ... it's so true. Daddy doesn't make us mourn - He lets our hearts feel. So that as we feel pain, sadness, mourning, we will also feel love, happiness, joy. We will be comforted when we hurt, held when we cry, loved throughout it all. My Daddy is a Daddy of Love.

Which makes me sit back and ponder right now ... because sometimes? I don't want to feel, I get sick and tired of feeling. I don't want to be aware of the emotions and thoughts and sensations. I don't want to mourn. Shoot, sometimes, I don't even want to be happy - because being happy means there's a slide somewhere around the corner, ya know? But ... to shut off all feeling, to cast aside the good and bad, to seal my heart off in an icy vault? That's not just 'keeping me safe from feeling', it's preventing my comfort too. And I know the power in feeling the Arms of Love wrapped around you. To lose that? I cannot even imagine.

And a few pages past my initial thoughts on Matthew 5.4, I found where I'd written the lyrics of a song that's rarely sung, but that I love so dearly, and it somehow seemed to fit this musing ... and thus what I end with:

There's no where else that I'd rather be
Than dancing with You as You sing over me
There's nothing else that I'd rather do
Lord than to worship You.

So rejoice, be glad, rejoice oh my soul
For the Lord, your God, reigns forevermore
I rejoice, for my God reigns.
So rejoice, be glad, your Father and your Friend
Is the Lord, your God, Whose rule will never end
I rejoice, for my God reigns.

My God reigns, and I'll dance the dance of praise
My God reigns, with a shout I will proclaim
My God reigns and I will worship without shame
My God reigns, and I will rejoice, for my God reigns.

(Posted in the Sister Devo group on facebook)